Wednesday, June 12, 2019

Reflecting

Welcome again.

After more than four years I'm writing my blog again. It is so insane to think of how much has changed in my personal life. I just binged on reading almost all of my old blogposts and I loved it! It is so funny to meet my older self again. I still recognize her so much and I still like so many of the things I've written about.

I wanna share a few things again in other future posts. Such as 'Music of the moment' and 'Them visuals'. 

Let's open up about my personal life.
I have graduated and work as a dentist now! It's so crazy to recap that in one sentence, because it was definitely a struggle and very eventful. During my time as a student I've dealt with depression. I was very unhappy, found it hard to enjoy life and honestly I was just trying to survive. I won't go into it too much, but I will say this: Healing was not overnight. I gave myself time and I think that was very wise of me to do. It took years and I am still aware and cautious about it.
I've experienced rape.. I won't go into details, but I'm doing fine. It's left me scars, but honestly not major ones. But yeah like I said, eventful.

Through it all I looked to God. Just hoping that the good days that would hopefully come would outshine these bad days. Not knowing if it would, but at least I had hope. And I'm so overjoyed that I feel like I have better days now. I dance more, which was always a big passion of mine. I take dance classes at Amsterdam Dance Centre. I started reading my bible. I work parttime, this was a consious decision. This way I feel I have more room to live, breath and not just only work. I don't want my work to be my life and I remember going to a conference for starting dentists and multiple speakers emphasized to have a hobby. You need something outside of work that you love. For me that is dancing.

The way I'm writing this it looks as if everything is well now. As if I've had bad days during my time at university and now since I've graduated it's all happy happy joy joy. Honestly I can't complain I have it pretty good, but obviously I still have struggles and complications, had occasional sleepless nights and of course lots of tears. But hey, God is still with me. He heals me, He's there for me, I'm not forsaken and His love means everything to me.

Wow I didn't expect to share this much. I expected to share three/four sentences of me reflecting on my old blogposts not my life..but o well I'll wrap it up with a quote.

Shay Mitchell once said: 'Anytime that something amazing has happened to me in my life it's been when I've been in the most uncomfortable and vulnerable situation.' When you're comfortable you don't grow.'

Btw I love the song He heals me from India Arie!

Ok, peace out bye

xx

1 comment:

  1. Wat heftig. Dit doet me intens veel verdriet om te lezen, Chelsea. De grootste fout van mijn leven is dat we nu al 10 jaar geen contact meer hebben. C.L.

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